When Family Hurts You

A few months ago, there was a misunderstanding between several close family members. Of course when people get upset, things are said that are better left unsaid. Things that have been "swept under the rug" for years...the rug was finally ripped away and everything was exposed. All the hurt feelings, all the things people thought, etc. It was a huge fallout between those close family members.

Then, someone in that circle decided to take their opinion and views on the subject and share it with people that had no business in knowing everything that was going on at the time. Of course their opinions and views were made up of false statements, whether they realized they were lying or not. Their intent was to smear names. The people they shared their views with then decided to send ugly messages to the family members involved-to tell them how horrible they were, that they should rot in hell, that they were scum of the earth, the person called the family member several horrible names that I won't put here, told them they were a hypocrite, etc.  Where they had no business sticking their nose, they did. And when they did that...they burned bridges.

In the end, all that happened was a tearing apart of family. True colors were exposed. I saw the person that had their named wrongly smeared wonder why it happened. They were hurt by the lies that were spread, by the awful things that their extended family had to say about them...all because of someone wanting people to take their side. There are laws against defamation of character-people get sued for doing exactly what this person/these persons did. It's just wrong and dirty and downright evil.

Each person in the close family has their opinion as to whether what they said was right or wrong during the initial misunderstanding. However, when lies are spread, that's a different story. I know that things will never be the same. I know apologies between some of the very close family members, where the first misunderstanding took place, were said.



We've all been hurt by family. Most times, we can look past what was said or done, but other times you can not. Trying to smear a name or a person's character only shows your true colors; it shows who you really are. I pray that my children are  1)never the person that tries to use their tongues to make themselves look better than others  2)never hurt by a family member to the extent that they choose to cut off all ties with them.

I Shall Never Complain Again...

 I shall never complain again about a grocery store not having the exact flavor or size of something I want after moving here. This is has to be one of the smallest commissaries in the world, except for Ft. Greely, Alaska, which pretty much doesn't exist.. I telling you. Our commissary is tiny.

Above is a picture of the commissary, all 3 rows of it. The aisles are very short too. There is not much here. It does cater to single/geographical bachelors since most service members on our base don't have a kitchen in their barracks and are on rations. There is a slim selection of everything, except for energy drinks, fresh fruit, cokes, chips and deodorant for men. 

Veggie selection, with potatoes and onions on a separate shelf.

The commissary is closed on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, so we have to plan accordingly. 

The fresh fruit selection consists mostly of apples, with a few oranges and (sometimes) grapes. 

The largest Army base here in South Korea is just an hour away (when there's no traffic), so we will make a monthly shopping trip to get most items that we need. 

The meat section (notice the cookies up on the top shelf and sushi on the shelf below that.

They don't carry honey mustard dressing!

One thing we don't have to worry about is milk. We can get a half-gallon carton of ultra-homogenized milk for about $2.70 per gallon. It's strange seeing milk that has a sell-by date of sometimes more than 6 weeks away, but it's how we get milk here. I bought a carton 2 weeks ago that is good through June 12. Sweet! No wasting milk ever before it goes bad!

Diapers are a problem here. Sometimes they have Naomi's size, sometimes not. With them being closed 2 days a week, we try to make sure we never get close to running out and if they don't have the size we need... :-O

The smallest selection of spices I've ever seen.

Here is the baking section. Only one type of muffin mix!

Our bread selection. It's not bad at all. We can get what we need, including bagels and pitas!

So, we do have a tiny commissary, but I'm thankful for it. A few years ago, there wasn't a commissary here, but with more families in this area now there was a need. We get what we need for the week, although our menu is very limited unless we go to the big commissary, but that's okay. We have a commissary and I'll never again complain about a "normal" grocery story...or the price of milk. Ever.

I'm Still Here...and I Still Don't Like Kimchi!

So I know it's been a while since I blogged. Life has been crazy! We moved, stayed in a hotel for nearly a month, got a place and moved in, Chris has been busy with work, home schooling is still going on, the house needs tending too, blah blah blah...

I hope to get back to blogging on a regular basis. I have so many posts I want to do and to be honest, it's been so overwhelming thinking about all of them and I thought about throwing in the towel and not doing the blog thing anymore, but I am not a quitter! I will go on! ;-)

One thing that we haven't figured out just yet in our neighborhood is where to get good Korean food. We came from a busy area and now we live in a little neighborhood. Sure, if we got out and drove around we would find Korean food, but one great thing about living in Korea is that they have all these small little restaurants in the neighborhood for the people and they don't have to get out and drive. We know there is a place around that has what we really like, but we just haven't found it yet. Besides, Chris is really the only one that loves Korean food!

One thing Chris loves is kimchi. One thing I hate is kimchi, but Chris loves this stuff. It's just something you either like or don't. Koreans live off of this stuff. They have it at every meal. They even have it for breakfast. It's a staple. I was told by a Korean that there are over 100 types of kimchi she eats and she loves every single one of them. There is hope that perhaps I might find one I like, I guess.

But this ain't it. The smell is one thing I can't stand. I just feel sick to my stomach by the smell. Then, there is the sight. Let's be honest, sight does play a role in what we enjoy. You never see a restaurant that goes out and just throws your food on the plate, right? I don't care how you hard you try, kimchi will never look appetizing to me. Then there is texture. I have textural issues when it comes to most foods. Anything slimy is a no-go. Anything really chewy (other than taffy) is something else you can knock off my list. I've tried a few types of kimchi and each one was either slimy or chewy. I felt sick for hours after trying each one.

Chris LOVES this Korean dish, which is called Bibimbap. It is his all-time favorite. I don't eat anything with eggs, so it is an automatic turnoff. I don't like onion either, nor bean sprouts or 75% of any other vegetable, which is what this dish is. I don't mind the very crispy and salty seaweed that's on top (called gim) and I like rice. I know it's a healthy dish, but I just can't stomach it.

So, we're still on the hunt for a Korean place that has food "to-go" so that Chris can pick up his Korean and the kids and I can eat a 'samich or cereal when he wants it. Not liking kimchi is one reason I am afraid to go out and eat at a sit-down place here. I don't want to come across as being rude when I refuse to try their food. That would be like somebody going over to my grandmother's house and turning their nose up to her cornbread and dumplings and fried chicken and Lima beans.

So while we're trying to embrace the culture, for the 8 months we've been in Korea I just haven't found "that" Korean dish that I couldn't live without. I do like manduguk, which was my first Korean food when we got to Korea. Our realtor at the time ordered a meal for us and that is what she got me. It's a broth soup with mandu. Speaking of mandu, I do like yaki mandu (basically a fried dumpling with meat or tofu and a few veggies). It's good. Bulgogi is another food we like; we ate it a lot before even coming to Korea. It's just marinated beef on rice. Yummy. The kids and Chris really love hotteok, which seems to be very popular in the winter months and it is tasty, but oily. It's pretty much a fried pancake with sugar, cinnamon and peanuts inside. But my favorite so far is tteokbokki, which is rice cakes (think short, thick spaghetti noodles, thick as your pinky) in a spicy broth. It is SO good. I love the spiciness of it, but I don't care for the fish taste that is in the broth. Some places pour the fish broth over the noodles to keep them wet throughout the day (it's a street food, so it's usually sitting around awhile), which grosses me out. We found a place in Uijeongbu that made tteokbokki fresh to order and it was so, so good. We haven't found a place that does it here without pouring fish broth all over it, which is an overwhelming taste that I don't care for. I know we'll find some I like, or else next time we head up to Uijeongbu, we'll get some there.

Hopefully I can get some pictures of the Korean foods that I listed as we find places here that make them. Still, nothing compares to some good cooking that MoMo makes. I love and miss my southern food!

Staying Busy with the Move

Do you see Chris and Levi Paul? I took this from our apartment window (we live on the 20th floor). They went across the street to buy bread from the cafe. Levi Paul has a black hat on his head and Chris is wearing that orange/gray coat.

It's been a while since I posted. Chris was busy at work, working crazy hours in the middle of the night. Then, we got word that we would be moving. Long story short, Chris still does not have his orders...and we're suppose to have movers here later this week! It's rather crazy.

So, we are moving to a small area of 1 million people, which is about the same size as the city we live in now. We will be so close to Seoul that it's considered Seoul to those that have no clue about the different areas. Kinda like how Atlanta has all these smaller areas around it that are considered Atlanta too, even though they aren't ( like Marietta, Peach Tree City, Dunwoody and the other 143 towns/cities that are considered part of the metropolitan area of ATL.)  So, we will technically be part of the Seoul "Capital Area" with the rest of the 25.6 million people. (Doesn't that sound nuts?! I've never been anywhere as large as Seoul. I'm a small-town Southern girl from a town of less than 5,000 people.)

So, things have been nuts. We are excited to start our adventure in our new place. We have no apartment yet (can't do that until we move and nothing is open yet), yet I will be trying to handle my 3 blessings and teaching Miriam during this move. I know we can handle it. We moved all the way to the other side of the world in the fall and we survived that trip. Surely we can survive a move that is just 21 miles away!

When I Look Into Your Eyes

As a parent, I do think one of the most beautiful things I see in my children when I look at their physical appearance is their eyes. Each of them have their own looks, but all three of them share blue eyes. Beautiful, blue eyes.

Miriam's blue eyes

I remember when Miriam was born and I saw her eyes. I was so excited to see that she had gotten my eye color. That is something that all 3 kids share from me. Blue eyes only run in my family, not their daddy's family. Miriam's eyes seem to be the bluest of our children. I love her eyes. With her fair skin, her beautiful blue eyes just seem to say so much when you look at them.

 

Levi Paul's gray-blue eyes

It's amazing how the eyes are the one thing that can connect us to others, even if we don't speak the same language. Think about it: when we talk to people, we look into their eyes. When you first look at somebody, you look at their eyes. The Koreans love to see blue eyes, especially in children. Levi Paul's eyes are a gray-blue. His are darker than Miriam's. Chris has hazel eyes, so while Levi Paul's eyes are still blue, they have a grayish color to them.

Naomi's blue eyes

Just like her sister, Naomi's eyes say so much about her. Just like her brother, she has the darker blue eyes, but not as much gray as Levi Paul has. When I am sitting with her and she's being quite, I can just stare into her eyes and it seems that we have this conversation just by looking at each other. 

As a mother, one of the best things ever is when your newborn child finally "connects" with you. It's through the eyes that this happens. It's when you're sitting there, holding them in your arms and you are just staring at them. Maybe they are getting a bottle or nursing, or you're just sitting there holding them..and then all of a sudden, they lock eyes with you. It's at that moment that time stops. Everything around you doesn't seem to matter-it's as if your ears shut off and you just take in that moment when those beautiful eyes look into yours as if to say "I know your my mommy. I know you love me and I know you will take care of me." That moment is a feeling I will never forget that happened with each of my blessings.

"The eyes are the window to the soul." -old proverb

I Like Books

I like books
I really do.

 

 Books with stories
And pictures, too.

 Books of birds
And things that grow.

 Books of people
We should know.

 Books of animals
And places, too.

I like books
I really do!

UCC

 This is the church we have been attending since getting here. I can't say that we are really involved in the church (for numerous reasons), but it's been a great church for us here in S. Korea. The church is on the 3rd floor of a building.

During the first part of the worship service, the kids stay with us. We sing several songs and the kids will sit and listen. Miriam sings the songs she knows, Levi Paul is either listening, drawing on paper or talking out loud. I usually hold Naomi and she bounces up and down and smiles at the people behind us. :-)  Then the kids head to children's church and we sing some more. We will sing all songs in English and some of the songs (especially the hymns), they alternate different verses singing them in English or Korean (as shown in the picture above). Whatever language is at the top, that is what is sung for that verse. I like that we can still know what is being sung since the other language is under the one being sung.

Let me say that my kids LOVE the children's church. They sing songs together and then go to their classrooms, being separated by age. Levi Paul has a hard time being separated from us if he can't sit near Miriam during their singing portion. That boy sure does love his sister and wants to sit by her, and of course she doesn't want him sitting by her because she wants her friends to sit by her. I am thankful for the children's program because each Sunday on the way home, Miriam and Levi Paul will tell us what they learned about. :-)

The pastor of the church is originally from Alabama. The sermons are spoken in English. During the times of prayer, it is spoken in English. When the announcements are made, if it is really important they will be done in Korean also. The majority of the people that have positions in the church (music, pastor/assistant pastor, children's ministry, etc) are all teachers and administrators at the local christian school, which was started after a chaplain in the Army asked for a school for dependent children. The church is connected to the school. The church reaches out to the community-the local Koreans, the soldiers and their families and to any other person that has come over to Korea for jobs. It is a great church!

Here is Naomi after church last week. It was the first week that she didn't cry when I dropped her off in the nursery. She still held on to me for dear life when I tried to hand her over, but she didn't cry! Of course she is all smiles when I get her.

Uijeongbu Community Church is where we are supposed to be in the season of our life (living in Korea in Uijeongbu). One of the neat things is that the girl I marched beside in marching band at Liberty University lives here and goes to the church (we lost contact after my semester on campus is 1998 and I had not clue she lived here and we have reconnected since moving here), a good number of the people in the church went to Liberty, another grew up near where Chris grew up in Virginia, an assistant pastor came here from Fairbanks, AK and knows our pastor and church back there and spoke highly it, which just made us smile, and we have met some other military families there. I am thankful for the chance to worship with others (Korean, Americans, Africans and others from other countries) for the short time while living here. The family of God is spread all around the world! It is great being with brothers and sisters in Christ while worshiping our Lord and Savior on Sundays!

Last week was our first time back after missing 2 Sundays with colds and sickness. We won't be going tomorrow with all the snow we are getting (no snow tires and Koreans don't really prepare for snow here), so we are sad, but hopefully we will be back next Sunday again to worship!

I'll Think Twice Before I Try That!

One thing I have found since moving here is that Koreans love some strange and odd food. I just can't get over how different their food is from ours. Very few things are familiar. There are a lot of shops and restaurants that have American cuisine, but Korean cuisine is not like ours at all. 

I knew a lot about the Korean culture from reading about it and also from hearing from Chris what he experienced last time he was here. Since his last time here, many American places have opened: McDonald's, Papa Johns, Dominoes, Outback, KFC, pretzel places, coffee shops, waffle places (Koreans LOVE waffles apparently), hamburger places, etc. However, it's different. Dominoes is expensive (we're talking $35 for a pizza) and the pizza has odd stuff on it-corn, shrimp, even mayonnaise. McDonald's is okay, but the fries taste a little different and they have menu items that cater to Koreans, which is understandable. In Alaska and Hawaii, I remember their menus being a little different with local things that we don't have in the lower 48. I haven't been to Outback, but their steak is shipped in from Europe, so it is expensive. Want mexican? Sure! You can have that, except the menu has kimchi tacos and kimchi fajitas.

So when we go to the local places, I can't help but wonder what in the world Koreans like about some of their foods. 

Koreans have this thing called red bean paste. It is in everything!  From what I have gathered, it is some form of bean (Azuki beans). For sweet things, they cook it in honey and I just hate it. The texture and the thought of a bean being sweet just grosses me out! In our local cafe, it's mixed with cream and put into a sandwich. You find it fried in a type of pancake (think fair food) and sprinkled with sugar. It's made into a hot paste that is added to all kinds of meals. They love their red beans here!

 Wants some Cheetos? You can have those, but you won't find the type we have at home. We found these and actually really enjoyed them. They are not fried and they are not cheesy. They are sweet and from what we could figure, it's some sort of barbecue. It was light and there was no powder all over our fingers. The kids really loved them and want us to get them again! This small bag was $1.25. Expensive for such a small amount.

 We have also seen a lot of sweet potato stuff. The few times I've tried Korean food (I don't care for the smell or taste of 99% of what I've tried), sweet potatoes are always in it. They even make a purple sweet potato doughnut that looks like a small purple sweet potato! We haven't tried it. I don't care for doughnuts here in Korea. They don't use flour like we do (sandwiches like what we eat are very rare here), so any pastry out there has an different type of flavor. They also don't do "sweet". Their sweet stuff is not sweet by American standards. It has saved us a lot of money and calories since we don't purchase a lot of their desserts from the cafe' across the street from our apartment. :-) (That other thing in the picture to the right of the doughnut is 2 mini hotdogs in a bun, with ketchup on top and it just sits in the non-refrigerated section of the store. Something tells me that can't be safe!)

 I am afraid to try Korean restaurants. I can't read their menu, I don't know what they are serving me and I hate kimchi. Koreans eat it at every meal. There are over 100 types of kimchi and I have only liked maybe 2 I tried. I don't want to go into a restaurant and insult the owner when I don't eat what they put in front of me. Speaking of restaurants, or any other type of business actually, they are small mom & pop shops. Everything on this side of town where we live (the older area), is a small business. Businesses line the streets everywhere, people sit out on the side of the street selling things like light bulbs, bug and mouse traps, food...anything! There are also food trucks everywhere that sell things like rotisserie chickens, Korean foods and produce. The restaurants have pictures outside their doors to show you what they serve. You see a lot of seafood dishes and apparently Koreans love octopus (or squid if that's what it is). YUCK!  Oh, and their Korean-style fried chicken is really odd-chewy, crispy and slimy. Chris likes it, but I just can't handle it. It's just so different.

So these are the types of things that keep me from going out and trying new things. Chris has told me that I'm just a person that doesn't care for Korean foods and he is right. I am open to trying some things, but nearly everything I have tried is something I don't like. I do like a few things and I constantly just eat those over and over again. Chris always goes out and brings the food back home. He LOVES Korean food. LOVES! So, he gets what he wants (it's usually a very healthy, vegetable only filled food with lots of raw veggies that he brings home and it stinks!) and I heat  up something  like soup for the kids and me. 

Koreans eat much healthier than Americans. The majority of them are very thin people and their diet is mostly veggies and rice...and then fish or pork. They have their foods, we have our foods. I just can't stomach the majority of their stuff. Sorry, Korea!

My Blessings

 Today is a day that I will focus on my blessings and not the other "things" that tend to weigh me down. These silly, precious kids are a true blessing and gift from God! I really don't know what I did before we had kids. It's like life didn't exist before Miriam came along. I mean, I know what I did and I had a ton of time on my hands, but goodness. That doesn't compare to the life I have now.

 Even on the bad days, they make me laugh. I love how silly they can be.These kids have their daddy's personality. They love to laugh, they love to make others laugh and they know they are funny. Miriam is just like her daddy in every way. She really is. Levi Paul is more quite and shy, but as seen in the picture above, he loves to make silly faces and he enjoys being funny. Look at Naomi's face in the picture...she is going to be our sarcastic one. I see it already!

 

 They have times when they are sad and upset, but that just gives me the chance to scoop them up in my arms and love on them even more! They argue and fight, they cry and complain, but who doesn't? The times of sadness and disobedience are very few and I'm thankful for that. I love how when they are upset, they run to us for love and when they are scared, they run to us for protection. There is no greater feeling in the world than to know that your child knows that you are the one that will help in times of need. I want my children to always know that they can come to me at any time they need, no matter what the problem and no matter what age they are.

 

 These kids have my heart. I would do anything for them. They are my life and I would die for them. What parent wouldn't? I am so blessed. The Lord gave these kids to us to raise and I am so thankful. I really can't put into words how thankful I am that He placed these children in our lives, so I won't try.

We make mistakes and being a parent is hard, but the rewards far outweigh the hard times. The giggles, the wet kisses, the "read me a story, Mommy", the toys all over the house, the squeals of excitement when their Daddy comes home, the moments of just having them come up and just wanting to be close-to just touch you, whether it be holding onto your leg while you fold clothes or climbing up and sitting right up against you as you talk on the phone or read an article and the endless "I love you, Mommy!"...that is what makes my world go round and I am so very thankful for these 3 blessings!

Lunar New Year

Friday was the Lunar New Year here. Chris was going to travel on the subway to meet up with someone near the airport in Seoul and was advised that is was not a good idea and that he should just stay put and that's exactly what we did. I taught Miriam in the morning and then we got out in the afternoon since it was quite warm (about 40 degrees). We just went for a walk around the neighborhood. It's been about a week since we got out and walked. It's just been way too chilly to get out. The wind, with the humidity, makes it nearly unbearable to get out with the kids sometimes.

Each time we go out, we see something new. There is just so much to see, we never see the same old things!

The picture above shows something that just drives me crazy and stresses me out! Koreans parks on both sides of the street (even double parking sometimes!) and don't obey traffic laws at all when it comes to parking. This street is narrow with cars parked like they are and the crazy thing is that we saw a city bus come through (at full speed) and it was so close to hitting the cars.

 

 Levi Paul enjoys the walks, even with the odd smells. Not to be ugly, but trash is just piled up outside of businesses. Even when it's cold outside, the trash smells. I can't imagine how bad it will smell with the heat in the summer!

 Just parking on the sidewalk. Why not?!

 The majority of the local businesses were closed while we were out. It was nice to get out and it not be too busy. Our "little" city has over 400,000 people in it and apparently we live in the quite area, which is not quite at all. The best thing though? We're making memories and we had a great little 45 minute walk in the middle of winter!

Here I Go Again On My Own

So, here I go again. Blogging on my own since Chris said he wanted nothing to do with it when I told him that political stuff couldn't be shared. Haha. I hope to blog as much as I did in Alaska, but things get busy around here with homeschooling and with 3 kids. I'm going to try though, just for you, Momma. :-)

Since we now live on the other side of the world, I figured it would be easiest to share with those that want to know what's going on, through blogging. I have been saving photos lately, just to share on the blog once I started it back up. So, when I get a chance, I will share them.

The picture below was taken a while back. It just shows what I see when I look out the window while folding clothes. No more stars at night; just a bunch of city lights and there is always traffic. I miss home...just the good 'ol U.S. For now though, this is home.